Main Text: Rom. 12:17-18
If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.(Rom.12:18)
When conflict is at the bedroom level, couples who are wise and who understand the implications of unresolved conflict will do everything within their power to positively manage and resolve the conflict before it grows deeper and more complicated. When conflicts are not resolved early, you will start remembering some of the bad things that your spouse has done to you in the past. When that comes in, you may start thinking that there will be a need for you to retaliate or you may just start hating your spouse for being such a wicked person.
Secondly, the longer the conflict is allowed, the more the chances for you to start having feelings of independence, which makes you to feel that you can do without your spouse. If you always wait for him to return from work before you eat together, you may decide to stop waiting for him before eating. When you depend on each other for some activities, they become a source of connection between the two of you.
Thirdly, the longer the conflict is allowed to stay, the greater the chance that you will tell the wrong person who may give you the inappropriate advice that will complicate matters further. The solution to a similar conflict in your friend’s home may not work in your own situation. You and your spouse are the only ones with the perfect knowledge of what is going on in your home.
Finally, the longer the conflict, the greater the tendency for each one of you to consciously or unconsciously create obstacles that will make it more difficult for simple resolution.
Conflicts therefore move from one level to the other when not properly managed and resolved early. The issue of management of marital conflicts is so important that there are so many homes that have ended up with divorce just because the husband or wife managed a simple matter wrongly and allowed it to blow out of proportion.
Any of the above is bad management! The way you handle your reactions when there is an issue with your spouse is important because it goes a long way to determine how long or how complicated the conflict will become.
Discussion Points With Your Spouse
* Is there any one of the above that may be identified with you?
* Sometimes we take our spouses for granted boasting that nothing can happen? Discuss how true it is that nothing can really happen.
My father and God, may I not be deceived into taking decisions that will harm my home in Jesus’ name.
THE LONGER A CONFLICT STAYS WITHOUT RESOLUTION, THE GREATER ITS POTENTIAL TO DESTROY YOUR HOME. – Dr. Mike Oluniyi